Insignificantly Significant

 May your august hypothesis prosper
 An expansive data mine on a computer
 Deploy then an adept statistical decoder
 May your august hypothesis prosper
  
 Bother is, the vaunted p-value
 Attains undisputed significance
 Only if its actual numeric value
 Shows quantitative insignificance
  
 For the noble hypothesis to advance
 0.05 is the strict standard bar
 Though to attain professional prominence
 The miniscule 0.01 is preferred by far
  
 If unlucky then by happenstance
 Rely wisely on laws of chance
 For an adroit analytic stance
 Often divulges secret significance
  
 In that patently propitious instance
 Add the fine intervals of confidence
 Theorize also clinical relevance
 With a pageful of erudite reference
  
 Because that comely, petite p-value
 Though plausibly dubious in science
 Has a potent publication value
  
 To clinch a promotion in abeyance
 Practice well then that modern research art
 To make insignificance into significance
 That you may also play your due part
 To convert significance into insignificance
  
 Hirji KF (2005) Insignificantly Significant, Epidemiology, 16: 123.
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